EdgarJohnny 50 Themes
by slaughterhouse
Summary: Like sharpening knives. M for language, violence, and gay situations.


**A/N: **I actually wrote this about a year ago now, but I figured I'd post it since there are a couple of people I know that were interested in seeing this haha. Err, yeah. JTHM and all related shit belong to Vasquez.

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**50 Themes**

01. Introduction

Johnny knows this. He has seen this man before, in some place, some lifetime. "...You tried to kill me before," the familiar man says softly. "Edgar Vargas." Johnny falls to his knees.

02. Love

"Have you ever been in love, Edgar? What do you think it would be like to be in love?" Johnny asks. Edgar's breathing stops at the... almost _childish_ question. "Love?" Edgar looks down at his lap, then over to the man sitting next to him. He pauses, before answering. "I... don't have any idea." He hates lying to Johnny.

03. Light

Edgar raised the shades, light filtering through and illuminating the dust particles that flurried about the room. Johnny squinted. "I don't like it. Close them."

04. Dark

The two sit on the hood of Johnny's car, staring out at the city below them. Johnny speaks up, breaking the silence. "Not only is it prettier from up _here_, but it's so much better at night, too. Not so amazing during the day. You know?" Edgar merely nods, trying to swallow the lump in his throat.

05. Solitude

Sitting in the kitchen at night with Edgar was one of the nicest things Johnny could ask for. He could tell that Edgar felt awkward, sitting there in silence, probably fearing for his life, but... all in all, Johnny just felt peaceful. Edgar takes a bite of his sandwich and smiles, though.

06. Break Away

Johnny has Edgar's wrists pinned up against the wall. "You think we're _friends_?!" Johnny barks in the taller man's face. Edgar rips himself from Johnny's grip, rubbing his wrists where the shorter man's grip had dared to bruise his skin. "Yeah," he breathes. "I _know _we are, because if we _weren't_, you wouldn't let me break away so easily." Johnny grimaces because Edgar is right.

07. Heaven

"So, yes, I do believe in Heaven," Edgar concludes. "You do too, right? At least some form of it?" Johnny falters. "...I've _been_ to heaven, actually," he mutters, "But, no, I don't believe in it." Sighing, Edgar pulls Johnny into a tight hug, despite the protests from the maniac.

08. Innocence

Edgar would be lying if he said he wasn't attracted to Johnny. It was a different form of attraction, though. It wasn't a sexual attraction... but on the other hand, there _was_ something oddly compelling about Johnny's innocence in sexual fields. Edgar mentally slapped himself for letting that even cross his mind.

09. Drive

Sometimes, Edgar just didn't trust Johnny's mental state enough to let him drive, and he made Johnny sit in the passenger's seat. The dark haired man would seethe all the way home, but Edgar knew that Johnny didn't mind it as much as he made it look like he did. He knew that Johnny found some sort of strange comfort in it.

10. Breathe Again

The church was silent, take for Johnny's gasps for air and the sound of sloshing water. Edgar waited for a minute for the other to catch his breath. When Johnny's breathing slowed to normal, he muttered, "I don't feel any different. I still feel like a 'sinner', Edgar." Said man frowned. "I told you, baptizing people is a fucking load of shit."

11. Memory

Johnny had told Edgar that he had absolutely no memory of his past. Edgar didn't know if Johnny really was just _that _fucking insane, or if he was using that excuse as some sort of comfort blanket. Either way, Edgar found it to be very sad.

12. Insanity

Johnny sits in the corner, back facing Edgar. He knows that Johnny is crazy. But it still scares the shit out of him when Nny goes into hysterical fits. Especially suicidal ones. Edgar rests a hand on Johnny's shoulder, but there is no jerk away from the contact. Johnny cranes his neck to look at the older man, the corner of his mouth twitching.

13. Misfortune

Edgar found that he wasn't the luckiest person on the planet. Most of the time, things didn't go right. In fact, they went completely wrong. But... despite all of his misfortune, he couldn't help but look at Johnny as something he was lucky to have in his life, even if the murderer _was_ intended to be yet another pinch of bad luck to add to it.

14. Smile

"You know," Johnny mused, tracing patterns on the couch with his thin fingers, "You make me smile. I mean, sure, other things do too, but not as much as you do. It's kinda creepy." Edgar looked up, surprised at Johnny's blunt remark. It was really rare that he would say things like that. Edgar smiled. So did Johnny.

15. Silence

Johnny hates the awkward silences that the two quite often share. Edgar isn't quite fond of them either, but sometimes these silences are accompanied by him wrapping his arms around Johnny's shoulders in some sort of awkward hug. Edgar thinks this makes the silence a lot more bearable. Johnny, on the other hand, thinks these silly hugs make the silence even _more_ awkward. But he doesn't say anything.

16. Questioning

Edgar never questioned Johnny's methods or motivations; he just let them happen. Johnny, however, questioned _everything_ Edgar did. Particularly the very first time that Edgar had tried to kiss him. Actually, more than _question_ Edgar, he put a knife to his throat.

17. Blood

Johnny constantly reminded Edgar that he actually _hated_ blood. Sometimes though, Edgar wasn't so sure of this. Especially when Johnny would dig his nails so deep into Edgar's back, that the bloodshed from the gashes alone were probably enough to cover the wall.

18. Gray

Edgar's eyes were gray. Johnny regarded it as a very wonderful thing. He would always remove the older man's glasses, and stare into Edgar's eyes. Not in any kind of _romantic _way of course, but Edgar would occasionally feel awkward and divert his vision. When Edgar looked away, Johnny would slap him lightly on the cheek and make him look back. "I can't see," Edgar would say, and Johnny would return the glasses.

19. Hair

For some reason, Edgar really found himself attached to the two funny looking tendrils of hair that hung from the front of Johnny's head. To the point where, when Johnny's hair would start to grow back in, he'd tell Johnny to shave it, and leave the two locks of hair. Johnny didn't mind though; in _his_ opinion, it was the most genius haircut ever, despite it being a hellish accident. Literally.

20. Vacation

Johnny had gone on several "vacations" in his lifetime, to figure himself out, to get away from things, to merely have a change of scenery. He would leave, and not return for days, sometimes weeks, sometimes months; and then a time came when he didn't return for years. Whenever he returned from any of these vacations, there would always be a single voicemail on his phone. Edgar. Telling him to stop by his apartment when he came back.

21. Cat

Johnny hated cats. Edgar had a cat. So, when Johnny would visit Edgar's apartment, it really sucked, because the entire time he'd be sneezing and sniffling miserably. After a while, Johnny started showing up to the apartment more frequently. Edgar didn't want Johnny to stop visiting, so he got rid of the cat. He'd rather have Johnny around, anyhow.

22. Tears

When Johnny wants to cry, he usually just retreats to some room in the lower levels of the house for a couple of hours. When he comes back upstairs, eyes red and puffy, he sits on the couch, and Edgar hugs him and strokes his back, tells him that it's okay to cry. Johnny starts to cry again, chokes Edgar within an inch of his life, goes back downstairs for the rest of the night.

23. Jealousy

Sometimes, Johnny would randomly become miserable over Devi. Edgar hated it, but never said anything. "I loved her, I really did," Johnny would say. And Edgar's jaw would clench, and he would nod, pretending to listen to Johnny go on about Devi and how wonderful and _different_ she was.

24. Foreign

It was such a _foreign_ feeling, kissing Edgar. Johnny winced as he felt a tongue brush against his own, and pulled away slightly. The feeling in his stomach was foreign, too. His arms wormed their way around Edgar's shoulders, another foreign feeling. He felt Edgar's mouth move down his neck, and Johnny jerked away again. Too much foreign. "That's enough touching for now," Johnny breathed, overwhelmed. The two resumed their previous sitting position on either end of the couch.

25. Happiness

Johnny had found true happiness three times in his life. The first time, he didn't remember, but he knew it was there. Happiness was there before he lost his mind. The second time, was with Devi. The third, with Edgar. When he told Edgar this, Edgar had no idea how to react. Johnny really grouped him with people like Devi? Wasn't she a lover of some kind? Then... what did that make Edgar? When Edgar asked though, Johnny had no answer.

26. Rain

When it would rain, Johnny would go outside and stand in it. "It's cleansing," Johnny would say. This particular day, Edgar joined Johnny. He looked over at the dark figure next to him through fogged glasses. Johnny's eyes remained closed. The two stood in the rain, completely soaked.

27. Flowers

Sometimes, Edgar did stupid things that confused Johnny. One of these things he would do; he would go and buy flowers, and put them in a vase on Johnny's kitchen table. When Edgar did things like that, Johnny didn't know whether to laugh or cry, or just get it all over with and kill Edgar.

28. Expectations

It wasn't that Edgar _expected _Johnny to show up at his apartment all the time, but whenever he didn't, Edgar would be lying if he said he wasn't incredibly disappointed.

29. Hand Holding

"Touch is so fucking useless and disgusting," Johnny spat, as Edgar grabbed his bony hand. Frowning, Johnny looked away, focusing on the television. Their fingers intertwined though, and Johnny didn't move his hand away. In fact, if Edgar wasn't mistaken, Johnny's grip on his hand tightened.

30. Spine

It was really fascinating, actually, feeling the bones in Johnny's body that stuck out in such awkward places. Edgar's hand slowly moved down Johnny's back, fingers catching on every ridge of his spine. Johnny shivered.

31. Eyes

Even though Johnny's eyes are huge and bright, the bags and purple skin around them make it hard for Edgar to think of his eyes as being "pretty."

32. Dreams

Johnny hissed, his thin legs winding tighter around Edgar's waist. His hands grabbed at anything they could; sheets, shoulders, hair. Johnny's breathing sped up and he panted against Edgar's neck, rasping obscenities and making soft noises that could be categorized as moans. But before they finished what they had started, Edgar woke up. He hated himself when he had those kinds of dreams.

33. Teamwork

Edgar knew Johnny wasn't a big fan of "partners in crime" or anything like that, but he always secretly figured he wouldn't turn down an offer to help Johnny kill some of the more deserving people.

34. Standing Still

Johnny almost always reacted strangely to being kissed. Sometimes, he would pull away. Others, he would try to kill Edgar. On a _very _rare occasion, he might try to participate and shyly kiss back. But, most of the time, he would remain unresponsive, stand still, and just let Edgar kiss him.

35. Dying

Johnny knew it was only a matter of time before he killed Edgar, accident or not. At his feet, blood pools around Edgar's head, and even if he isn't dead _yet_, Johnny doesn't even want to try to stop him from dying. Later that night, Johnny leaves town, and dies too.

36. Two Roads

Edgar and Johnny have had many conversations about Heaven and Hell. Edgar explained that, when everything ends, Johnny would be going down a different road than Edgar. Johnny got angry and locked himself in the basement for the next couple of days.

37. Delusion

Sometimes, Johnny wonders if he's just under some sick delusion that Edgar actually likes him.

38. Family

"Well, none of us really have a family," Edgar muttered. "To be... totally honest, you're the closest thing to family I've ever had." Johnny hated when Edgar said stupid sentimental shit like that.

39. Creation

Johnny often brought up that he thought he might have been an artist before he lost his mind. "Where else would all those paintings have come from?" He'd ask. "Plus, it makes sense. I went fucking nuts because I couldn't create art anymore. Or vice versa." Edgar found that to be quite a possibility. He thought it was a shame that Johnny had resorted to drawing those awful Happy Noodle Boy comics.

40. Deep In Thought

"Johnny?" Said man shook his head back and forth violently, which meant Edgar had better shut up. 'As not to interupt his train of thought,' Edgar figured to himself. An hour passed before Johnny turned back to the other. "Sorry, I was thinking. What did you want?"

41. Keeping A Secret

Originally, Johnny had made Edgar to promise never to keep secrets from him, so as to have a perfect friendship. However, this made Johnny a huge hypocrite, because _he_ had countless secrets that he wouldn't dare share with Edgar. Such as the fact that he really _wasn't_ disgusted when Edgar would touch him, or that his feelings for the older man far surpassed feelings he had ever had about anything before, ever. Or just the plain fact that he _did _have feelings for Edgar at all.

42. Tower

"You're like... my tower, kinda," Johnny says. Edgar raises an eyebrow at whatever metaphor Johnny is trying to make. "You're this tall, sturdy thing that I can crawl inside and feel protected. If that makes sense." Johnny looks away, immediately regretting saying such a stupid thing. How embarrassing. Edgar sips on his tea and a smile curves at his lips. "It makes sense," he says. "What a cute thing to say, though." Edgar waits for the knife that is sure to be at his throat for calling Johnny 'cute,' but no knife comes.

43. Waiting

Edgar is well aware of the fact that Johnny watches him sleep. Most nights, he actually lies there and pretends to sleep, waiting for Johnny to climb in through the window of his apartment and sit on the foot of his bed. When he knows Johnny is there, that is when he goes to sleep.

44. Danger Ahead

Edgar knew that being friends with Johnny meant that he was constantly in danger. What he didn't know, was that the danger ahead wasn't Johnny _getting angry _and killing him, but rather, Johnny _loving_ him so much that he would have to kill him.

45. Sacrifice

"What's the biggest sacrifice you've ever made for someone else?" Johnny asked offhandedly, chewing the straw of his brainfreezy. Edgar thought for a moment, then laughed. "I quit my job so I could sit around and do nothing with you all day." Johnny didn't find Edgar's supposed joke to be very funny. "I'm serious." Edgar frowned. He didn't like this question.

46. No Way Out

There were times when Johnny wanted out of the stupid "friendship"-like thing he shared with Edgar. When he wanted to just go back to how it used to be, without him. But... he knew he was in too deep. There was no way out.

47. Rejection

Edgar leaned close into Johnny's face, their gazes locking. He could feel Johnny's shaky, shallow breaths ghosting over his own mouth. Their noses touched, and Johnny jerked a little. Edgar slowly reached a rough hand up and rested it on the nape of the Johnny's neck, and felt him tense at the motion. Johnny pushed Edgar away. "You know I hate touching."

48. Annoyance

Of all the people in the world, Edgar was the only one who had never annoyed Johnny. Sometimes Edgar frustrated Johnny, made him cry, made him scream. And made Johnny want to fucking _kill_ him, but he never once _annoyed_ Johnny.

49. Horror

The first time Edgar had ever seen Johnny kill someone, he felt like he was watching a really awful, grisly horror movie. The first time Edgar had ever kissed Johnny, Johnny felt the exact same way.

50. Traps

Johnny wasn't a huge fan of setting traps... it seemed mediocre, and he knew he didn't need them. He _did_ have some made though... but mostly in the event that someone might possibly escape him. Namely Edgar..


End file.
